Yeah, this is what scares me. How do you live in the moment and plan for the future? How do you be fulfilled in work while having a good personal life? I’m kind of scared that some sort of balance between the two is completely idealized.

I’ve read a lot of Alan Watts recently, and his deal is enjoying life where you are. But at the same time, I really value personal freedom and doing my own thing.

And on top of all of that, I want to be happy with my future SO, whoever she is. Maybe I’m just going through a conflict of goals right now.

Life is a huge and beautiful thing, and I just want to live as much of it as I can.